its so dang sunny outside - but why am i here?

i was sitting in a desk with scribbles on it wondering were i was or why i was in there .the walls painted lightly with a majenta purple , there was a heavy smell of  chalk that botherd my eyes . the seat in which i was placed in was horridly uncomfortable , but what could i do ? i licked my lips tensely looking at the piece of paper that lay in front of me - i did not understand it at all  .more than half of me wanted to get up and leave - leaving everything behind ; but that would get me nowhere . so i sat there staring at the piece of paper , smelling the toxic fumes of chalk , in an uncomfortable chair . oh how  loath the thought of having to come hear again tomorrow and the next day , and the next day , and the next. its nasty , too disgustingly nasty ....

i was blushing like a tomatoe while i was writting this

i really want to know what you think but at the same time i could care less . When i feel your eyes pouring into my back i get the chills . When i give you a hug it brings back old and rusty feelings from the past . I begin thinking of you more now than ever but then i catch myself thinking such grotesque thoughts i flip out . Its not the same as before - were not children anymore ....

Your tall ,handsome , funny - very caring but have your faults ,and when i see you with other girls it angers me but really i have no right to be . its stupid but i know i have feelings for you but when i finish writing this they will die completely   . You treat everyone indifferently , is there anyone whom you hold dearly to your heart..? Ahhhhh ~ its sad , my love story ended way before it was even going to start.

the mind of an exciting flower

i was standing in the grass gazzing at the huge world infront of me as bees and huge giants passed by i felt sort of obliviose to the world . the sun shinning hot above me was givving me energy and i felt that i could make another day w/o being squashed. as the wind blows i blow along with it . as a flock of children pass by a little girl stops and looks at mee , staring untill she is called back to the herdd . i , myself wasnt that beautifal - my friend next to me was lushis red ,tall ,and beautifull- i was pure white - and slightly bent  . the day goes on and i am still just blowing with the wind . . .

 

ohh ok heyy <: uhmm madnees! ijust started this thingy >blog< and im confusd well not totally confused but ... confused. cuz this is Most deffinatly not a diary and my lifee is not a tragedy after tragedy situation butt i want to put my word out there ... that should be ok . but really im probly only going to right nonsence on here that might anger and or annoy you and i dont think im sorry O.O for that ... my brain contrudicts itself constently - im not smart at all even thoo people think i am , skinny jeans are grotesc pants but if they wernt so cute on my thighs i would not were them im really childish >REALLY CHILDISH< ask my preshis <spelled rong> friends ... the tribe . i have nasty dreams that try to tell me something about my brain but i dont ever get it ok soo there you go ... the madness u just enterd in called MY blog <;